Robin's Musings

It is really true that everyone experiences self-doubt and even self-hatred. And, for many people the result of that experience is suffering. As we begin to notice the discordant energy in our bodies, our minds believe that since the energy exists it must be true. Like a law of cause and effect in action, we perceive the effect (feeling this self loathing energy) and then look for the cause of this feeling internally. The mind (and it is your ego mind I am referring to here) generates stories to match the feeling. These are stories like:

I should be doing better
I am such a mess
I should really get my act together
I am a terrible mother/father/daughter/son/sibling/spouse/friend
I should be more successful by now
I am not successful- I never seem to amount to anything
Nobody likes me, I’m unlikable, I am unlovable
I’m a mess

The basic fear alive in us – whether we know it or not, whether we are working on it or not – is: I am not enough. You may have different words than mine to describe it of course.

Not only is this ‘Cause and Effect’ energy is alive inside of us we also project it out onto the world. If the belief (either conscious or unconscious) is that you are not good enough, then you see this evidence in your daily life. You see this in your relationships. At work. In your activities. In your heart. And, you make up stories about the people you see while you carry these feelings inside. Cause and Effect. The Effect is that you don’t feel good inside yourself, and your ego mind looks for the Cause somewhere outside of you. Like this:

He isn’t nice to me
She is a bad friend
They aren’t good clients
My parents were jerks
Why don’t they ever give me a break?
He is mad at me
They do not treat me well
Nobody cares about me

Does this make sense to you? Basically, perceive something being done to you, and make a story to go along with the perception. Since you believe the story, you feel miserable on some level.

What to do about it? If you can understand how this works on a personal level, you can begin to unhook yourself from the pattern. This could be a wonderful practice for you to find the evidence of what I am saying operating in your life and then shift it. Once you find a thought that you are making yourself upset with, practice saying this thought means nothing! Or challenge the thought by saying, Is it really true? Can I absolutely know this is true? Rather than letting the thoughts guide you and direct you in your life like a helpless victim out to sea without a paddle.